Ugha bugga boo. My face is swollen, there’s no gol durn ibuprofen and I might go make some coffee. My face feels better if I sit upright. And sitting in the living room watching reruns on TV Land [Roseanne, okay, I was watching Roseanne!] was giving me the sads. So why not turn my up all night with pain into some truly [crappy? wonderful? purloined? loined? no loins at all?] writing? Do some pages, maybe rework something that, when I read it later, I’ll hope I saved the earlier draft. Yeah, one of THOSE NITES. [Remember when Nick at Nite used to show classic sitcoms instead of…sads, uh huh. I worked a lot of graveyards in my day and NAN was my Jesus. The Mary Tyler Moore Show, Newhart, Barney Miller, Bewitched, All in the Family…pretty much a lot of shiny people having mild adventures in half hour time periods. You kids get off my lawn! That always sounds so funny in my head…hello, sads.]
Oh– the ‘skinny repeal’ of the ACA AKA Obamacare…just died in the latest vote. Three GOP senators [Murkowski, Collins and yes, McCain] just gave a hearty FU to Clownstick von Pumpkincunt and Mr. Turtletwat. [Mitch McConnell, for those who might not be American. If you don’t know who the Bad Pumpkin is…I can’t help you.] Yes, I’m CUSSING. My face hurts. Otherwise, I’d use polite dry language in the G-rated area. Yep. Oh, did anyone see or read the interview where the Bad Pumpkin’s newest hire [Scaramucci? I am far too lazy to go check spelling right now, sorry] jumped into X-rated language and hillbilly feudin’ time with others in the current clustermess that is the ‘murican gubbermint right now?? The line about the Bad Pumpkin’s closest adviser [Stevie ‘Sucks Himself’ Bannon]? Yeah. I just got a warm fuzzy sensation around my heart reading that.
Oh but…yesterday was also a bad day for being gay or transgender in Super Straight States of ‘Murica. Yeah. I wrote a whole rambly post about the Clownstick and its Twitter announcement about who can serve in the military. So. Yeah. I can’t even— that phrase just seems so apt lately. It fits. I can’t even. And you just stop, spluttering, foam dripping from your jaws. You’ve probably released your bowels a bit [sometimes outrage loosens those muscles that hold all your poop in…I might have made that up! or even gone for a snack full of carbs, chemicals, salt, corn syrup, fats and sprinkles.]
It’s late. There’s no ibuprofen. Thanks, Obama! [He is somehow to blame for the absence of over the counter cheap ass mild pain killers.] Oh, there’s aspirin but that’s so retro Nick At Nite back when they were showing MTM and Larry, Daryl and Daryl. [If you don’t know who Larry, Daryl and Daryl are…fuck you. Just a straight up we cannot be friends and go away.] Did I mention my face hurts which is why I’m up writing these words in clumps and clusters? Have a nice night.
Note to all concerned: can someone remind me not to write middle of the night, pain coloring my world view, posts? Or maybe write more of them? Or maybe stick to posting about unicorns and rainbows? Thanks! I should write a post about unicorns and rainbows…hello, August.
ANN WUEHLER 